Previously on Lost, Locke is stupid, Jack is judgmental, Marvin Candle is creepy, Michael is an asshat. Cuh-razy.

BOAT! BOOOOOOOAT! EVERYBODY STRIP OFF AND SWIM AFTER THE BOOOOOAT! Seriously, three hot men stripping by the water. SHIRTLESSNESS.
JJ, Damon and Carlton, you are absolved of all your sins. I love you.

lol 'Maybe it's a trap.' Or, as Captain Tightpants would put it, a TRAAAAAP!

Gee, Sawyer's massive, infected gunshot wound sure has cleared up nicely. Hey, it's Sexy Jesus Desmond! What a...not...surprise. Whatever. Four hot men on a boat!

LOST!

So we have officially established that one cannot escape from Craphole Island. It'll either kill you or let you go, I suppose. Snowglobe! LOL. Whose theory was snowglobe?

PRISONER DESMOND SO HOT FLASHBACK OMG. Who's the girl? Our Mutual Friend? April Grace...no relation to Maggie? Hey, Alan Dale, an actual Australian! Also on The OC. Oh, right, plot. Ooh, a dishonourable discharge.

Ahh, rain and cold. Definitely in the UK, then. ...and their actual Australian is playing a Brit. LMAO.
Jerks stole his letters. Run awaaaaaay!

Longest credits ever. Here goes Sayid, smartest man on the island! BLACK SMOKE?!?!
'This time they will know that *we* are coming.' OMG.

Dude, Locke? You do not TELL Eko anything. You ask him. Nicely. And another recurring line!
Told you so. Locke just got pwned.

Nothing Michael has said gels with anything that our guys know about the Others. He is such a terrible liar. Even KATE worked it out.

Oooh, the Hostiles!

Libby has different hair! Hi Libby!
He could be gay. You don't know. It's always 'Who is she'? Henry Ian Cusick looks so hot in the flashbacks.
IT'S LIBBY'S BOAT? David like Dave? Cuz that'd just be weird.
Last but most important point, WHO THE FUCK JUST TAKES A BOAT OFF SOMEONE THEY NEVER MET BEFORE?! Jesus, apparently.

Yay, Sayid's gonna bring Jin! Daniel is so pretty with his blue shirt and long hair and Daddy smile. HELL YES GO SUN.

LOL CAUGHT IN A NET LOLOLOL.
WTF CRAZY BIRD. Bahaha unloaded guns. It DID say Hurley...I think...
Jack's bad lie is STILL more convincing than Michael's lies.

Charlie walkin' through the jungle...Charlie lookin' pretty...Charlie carin' about Locke...
I love Charlie. I...can't figure out what he's trying to tell Locke. But man, Dom looks SO pretty right now.

Ooh, Sun smacking down Sayid. LOL JIN.

LOL DESMOND'S HAIR.

Carrots what? Why do we have flashes of Locke in The Pearl?

LOL Sawyer and Hurley.
'Not hungry.'
'You serious?'
Yes, that's right Michael. You're fucked.
Okay, you know what? I get that they're trying to remind us of what's come before, but enough with the repeat lines. They're really bugging me. I like the more mythological aspects of the show and all but that's three already.

WHAT THE FUCK FOOT. Remarkably Argonath-like foot. Remarkably Argonath-like FOUR-TOED FOOT.

LOCKE STOLE EKO'S JESUS STICK. Bastard. Locke is always more fucking sure about everything than anything else in his entire life and it always turns out badly.

Ouch, poor Desmond. Followed by the most B-grade scifi horror techniques ever seen on Lost.
HOLY CRAP IT'S SAYID'S TORTURE MAN. Am I just forgetting about an earlier line about carrots?! Kelvin sounds even more despondent about saving the world than Desmond did.

Haha Jesus has the Jesus stick! 'We locked out a priest?'

Hey beautiful guitar-playing boy.
'Charlie, do you know how they got the hatch door open?'
'No, but if you hum it I can probably play it.' LOL. EKO PULLED HIM BY THE HAND. I'm telling you, domestic bliss.

BAHAHA ALIENS OMG.
Sawyer killed one! Who did Sawyer kill?
Jack's exposing The Plan? But what about Sayid?!
Yeah, Michael, say sorry enough and they might actually just up and forgive you for double homicide and leading them to their deaths. I love that Sayid constitutes The Plan.

Mmm. Sayid speaking Arabic = hot. They're coming up on Stonehenge!

Charlie 'Don't end up like Dr. Artz.'
'Eko is very upset John.'

Kelvin made The Map? He was Dharma?

Dude. Eko pushed Charlie up against a wall and stripped off his belt. That's all I'm sayin'.
OMG NO RUN CHARLIE DON'T DIE OMG. AUGH OMG. CHARLIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

So the button keeps the island from kabooming. What if the watching of the button-pushing is the psychological experiment? WHAT ABOUT CHARLIE?

Locke, you are an unbelievable ass. Yes, his world crumbled down around him, blah blah blah, WHAT ABOUT CHARLIE?

I love Sayid but right now I just wanna know WHAT ABOUT CHARLIE?!?!
The whole shanty town's a setup.

The messages went nowhere! But WHAT ABOUT CHARLIE?!?!
OH NO SAWYER!

Does anyone else feel like we're the experiment and the Lost writers are the Hanso Foundation/Dharma Initiative at this point in time?

WHAT. ABOUT. CHARLIE?

I love Desmond's protective gear: a hanky.
He killed Kelvin ZOMG. Not that it wasn't unwarranted and an accident...
That was tense. Do I need to say WHAT ABOUT CHARLIE? again?

Oh. My. God. 'I think I crashed your plane.'

Hi Alex! If we don't find out if Charlie's okay really, really soon I'm going to have to choke a bitch.
Another Tom! As soon as not!Henry stepped off that boat I felt a strong, urgent and powerful desire to kill him slowly. What's business?

Charlie! He's bleeding. Poor baby! OMG HE CAN'T HEAR!
OH NO EKO!

LOCKE YOU SON OF A WHORE.

Oh the light!

Oh no, let Locke do it! I wanna keep Desmond around!
...and another repeated line.

CHARLIE AND EKO BETTER BLOODY WELL GET OUT OF THERE ALIVE.

'I was wrong.' Gee, Y'THINK?! Fucking Locke, man.

Oh God Oh God Oh God.

Charlie's okay! Oh, Charlie. Why do I get the feeling this ear thing isn't going to just go away? Him being a musician and all.

Michael and Walt are just...leaving?

'We're the good guys, Michael.'
'What am I, stupid?' Uh...do you want me to refresh your memory?

...what's it? Creepy kid, strange powers, just...waltzes off the island?
That explains why Hurley, then. No Jack, Kate or Sawyer at camp? Gonna be a whole different camp without them. I want Sawyer back! They can have the other two.

Charlie/Claire kissage! Finally! He got over Eko fast. Is Eko okay??? At this point I couldn't give a flying rat's ass about Locke, but I love Eko.

What. The. Fuck.

DESMOND! COME BACK!



In Harry Potter news, Helena Bonham Carter as Bellatrix. The old one got preggers. Also, Young Marauders news here.

And finally, new very sexy pics of Jensen and Jared.

Excuse me, I need to go lie down for a month to recover from the 60 heart attacks I suffered during tonight's Lost. Maybe recover my brain.
Green Queen

From: [identity profile] sarahmarie054.livejournal.com


I couldn't have written about the Lost Finale any better.
It was perfect.

Seriously, the whole time, I was like, "What about Charlie?"

From: [identity profile] kilted.livejournal.com


Does anyone else feel like we're the experiment and the Lost writers are the Hanso Foundation/Dharma Initiative at this point in time?

Oh yes... quite often. When someone up-loads it, you should see the creepy Hanso guy that was on Jimmy Kimmel after Lost. Gave me the jibblies.
And I agree with you about the ear thing. Poor Charlie.

From: [identity profile] snuffkin.livejournal.com


kissing leads to sex leads to death T_T No Charlie T_T

But he looked hot today :O I hate Locke so much right now. SOOO MUCH. Somebody needs to slap him. Really hard! But maybe he's dead :X



From: [identity profile] green-queen.livejournal.com


Yeah, but only for women. I've been more worried about Charlie's suddent Big Gay Relationship with Eko. It was Boone's Big Gay Relationship with Locke that got him killed, after all.

From: [identity profile] chyldone.livejournal.com


Does anyone else feel like we're the experiment and the Lost writers are the Hanso Foundation/Dharma Initiative at this point in time?

I sometimes wonder :P

**laughs** I did the samething...What about Charlie...
Now we have all summer to wait, just to know if Eko or Locke or desmond are still alive.
I like Desmond...I want him to survive :)

From: [identity profile] fluffers.livejournal.com


Four hot men on a boat
What a fantastic title for a spinoff!

From: [identity profile] green-queen.livejournal.com


Your *NSync icon is the cutest thing ever.

Bring Charlie, make it 'five hot men on a boat' and I'm in!

From: [identity profile] fluffers.livejournal.com


Thanks, I love it! That photoshoot is my favorite they've ever done. So absolutely adorkable.

Bring Charlie, make it 'five hot men on a boat' and I'm in!
Dude, it's a deal! We'll pitch to JJ first thing Monday! Which means we'll need to wake up early to set up an ambush wherever he gets his coffee in the morning. Is it really kidnapping if you intend on letting the person go eventually?

From: [identity profile] stufsocker.livejournal.com


Wow, that was the best commentary yet! Good on ya! teehee... hanky.
I think I like the Helena Bonham Carter casting. She can most definitely do creepy.

From: [identity profile] lauren0323.livejournal.com


You have outdone yourself this time! LOL That was the best recap ever. You need an icon that says "What about Charlie?" Hehe

I knew things weren't going to end well, when Locke took Eko's jesus stick! You don't eff around with a man's J-stick.

Charlie was adorable in the hatch! I love him torn between his estranged island Daddy, and his new husband. What's a boy to do?!

If Charlie can't hear next season, maybe someone on the island can teach him sign language. I want him to say "you complete me" to Eko, using sign. :oD

From: [identity profile] green-queen.livejournal.com


Oh, but Charlie's okay now, so I don't have to worry.

'I wish I knew how to quit you' in sign language would be hilarious ;)

From: [identity profile] dwlikeebeinlost.livejournal.com


::points to icon::

my icon shows how I feel about locke.

From: [identity profile] rosamundeb.livejournal.com


Wait. wtf. That was LIBBY??!?!?! Well... the boat IS named Elizabeth. So, she's crazy, a bartender, a widow... and welloff enough to give away a boat for twue wuv? Oh, wait, that's right... we've already established that she's crazy... *L*! I did not recognize her!

From: [identity profile] thharwood.livejournal.com


I just read this post now because I didn't want to get spoiled earlier, but wow! we had pretty much the same reactions to everything!

From: [identity profile] subtle--sarcasm.livejournal.com


Lost was just.... a bloody mindfuck... cannot say more about it at this time, just finished watching and ran to read your running commentary right afterwards.

But while I try to calm down: BEST CASTING EVER! Helena as Bella is just so damned great

From: [identity profile] subtle--sarcasm.livejournal.com


seriously... i .. really wouldn't even know where to start, there are so many things swirling. but your reactions were, as usually, pretty much my reactions only phrased more amusingly. So it's all good ;)
.

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